Happy Anniversary to US!

3 YEAR ANNIVERSARY

Draper Utah Temple 4.26.2017

Three years ago today we got married! We were sealed for all eternity in this very temple in the very sealing room where we did temple work tonight. And of course it was rainy just like our wedding day. How fitting.

THREE YEARS BABY!

Tacos for the win

Seeing as we have SO much experience and wisdom with THREE WHOLE YEARS of marriage under our belts, we thought we'd each share (mostly for our benefit) three lessons learned from three years of marriage. So indulge us as we capture a little glimpse of where we are at on our road to forever.

Disclaimer: just because we"learned" the lesson doesn't mean we're actually good at it.

K: How to SHOW love well and often.

I think we are all familiar with the Love Languages theory--and it's the real deal. Over time I've learned how to really SHOW Scott that I love him. Those big long hugs right when he gets home from work. Taking time to just hold each other and be still for a while...even though I have a long list in my head of things I want to get done. When I suggest we stay in to watch a movie and cuddle he stops in his tracks and says "I just love you." I'ts the little things, right? The little things often make the biggest difference. So finding out Scott's "little things," trying to show love to him in those ways, and doing so OFTEN, has helped our marriage grow over the past three years.

S: Knowing myself better.

I've learned to see myself better through the mirror of my wife. I am more aware of my strengths and my weaknesses because they are all out in the open for her to see. My private self is now shared with her. Those strengths and weaknesses also become more visible as they work in tandem with her strengths and weaknesses. She helps me see where I can improve and makes me more confident in what I'm doing well. I hope I do the same for her.

K: ALWAYS speak well of each other.

Sometimes people talk badly about their spouses--isn't that terrible? But it happens, and sometimes we don't even realize we are doing it! Now there's a big difference between a good-humored ribbing and complaining, but it's a fine line and looks different in every relationship I imagine. Scott and I discussed early on that we wanted to always speak well of each other to other people. This has helped inspire confidence between us. I know I can trust him, that he's on my side and he's got my back. Trust, we've discovered, is one of the most binding glues you can apply to a relationship. And a spouse, if anything, should be your most trusted confidant. I'm grateful for a husband who is always on my side.

S: Put your spouse first.

Putting your spouse first will ALWAYS lead to more happiness in your marriage. You both need to give 100%, not 50/50. As in, I shouldn't wait to take out the trash because she left a couple of diapers on the changing table. Just throw the diapers out myself AND take the trash out. Whether its dishes, cleaning up, taking care of the baby--don't just assume that it's the other person's job. That's 50/50 thinking. If you see a need, just do it. Whatever it is, it's 100% BOTH of your responsibility because you are ONE. Serve each other. You'll both be 1 million times happier.

K: Strengthening a marriage takes intentional effort and time.

This is something I'm learning right now. I knew that having a baby would effect our family in

big ways, but I didn't anticipate how much it would effect the dynamics of our marriage. I love Scott, and "Dad Scott" makes my heart want to burst several times a day, but in all honesty--things have changed. He's not my sole sun and moon any more. My attention is divided. I have a harder time focusing on just him, even when we are alone. That motherly instinct is STRONG, and I'm discovering that if I'm not careful it will just take over and smother everything else.

So, I'm currently learning how to be more intentional in strengthening my marriage. Praying to know how I can better show love to my husband. Planning dates just the two of us. Making time to focus solely on him...you mamas know that this is a lot harder than it sounds. And if you have any tips of how to strengthen a marriage after baby, I'd love to hear them! I guess in three years I've learned that having a happy, strong marriage doesn't just happen, especially after babies, but like any good thing it takes work and effort to make it great. We're working on that :)

S: I MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE!

There were other options, other choices I could have made in life and love. I'm just glad that I chose someone so perfectly suited for me. (Isn't he just so romantic! **all the heart eyes!**)

In another three years it will be interesting to compare our "lessons learned." I'm sure we'll look back and think "cute--they thought they had things figured out" haha! Well, we are learning, growing, and becoming better for each other and better together all the time. Today I feel grateful for marriage, for parenthood, for the refining experience of being a part of a family, and most of all...for now and eternity with my handsome hubs. Life is SO good.

Happy Anniversary Meu Amor!