First Christmases!

This Christmas was special. Not only was it Annie's first Christmas, it was my first Christmas as a mother. And that changed everything.

First of all, Christmas with kids is the bomb. Any kids! Your own kids, nieces, nephews, neighbor kids, you name it. There's an extra sense of magic and wonder. Even though Annie was too little to really "get" Christmas, she reminded me what makes Christmas so wonderful.

1. The Giving: Even though Annie was too little to understand she was getting gifts, giving them to her and watching her get so excited was thrilling. She loved Christmas! She was extra smiley all weekend and it made everything more magical. Some highlights were watching her gaze at the twinkle lights on the Christmas tree, the adorable Christmas outfits...melt me!, how she tore into the tissue and wrapping paper that we stuck in her hands, and the look on her face as she tried out her new rocking horse and ExerSaucer. I mean just look at that face! Pure joy! I can't wait to see how those eyes will light up next year.

2. The Serving: While being a stay-at-home mom doesn't mean I have all the time in the world (do not underestimate the neediness of a baby!), it does mean I do have more time and opportunities to serve. You should see the good that a network of moms can do! Thanks to some great mom examples and an extra push from the #LIGHTtheWORLD campaign, Annie and I were able to fill our Christmas season with service big and small. One of my favorite memories that I'll always cherish...and Annie will never remember...is when she and I teamed up with another mommy/baby friend of ours to visit some elderly people in the area. We chatted with the ladies as they got their nails done and took Smiley-face balloons to some residents that don't get visitors. The smiles that those balloons and my little girl brought to their faces were absolutely priceless. Let me tell ya, old people LOVE babies. She was the one lighting the world. It was one of those "This is what it's all about" moments. And it was even better because I was doing it with Annie.

3. THE Baby: At some point this season, I began so see the Nativity story in a way I never have before. I have always respected and admired Mary, but this year that admiration reached a whole new level. I saw her for the first time as simply a mother. Full-term, uncomfortable, contractions, back pain (on a donkey no less!), fatigue, fear... only to arrive at a place crammed with travelers and virtually no privacy. I wonder if Mary ever looked to the heavens and asked: "Really?" Then I remember that this was something she accepted, she CHOSE, to do...and it was only the beginning. Serious kudos to Mary.

Then there's the baby. THE Baby. That little divine infant has never been more real to me in my whole life. As I've imagined that stable scene again and again throughout the Christmas season, there's greater texture and feeling than ever before. Snippets of Annie's first days came to my mind: tiny baby cries, blinking eyes, little hands and fingers reaching up. Now I see it all in a dirty, drafty, holy stable. And I start to feel all the feels. I remember how it felt after Annie was born: the relief, the reverence, the peace. Now take that and multiply it by 1,000 and that must have been what Mary felt. That really happened. The Savior of the world came to earth as a helpless BABY. What love she must have had for Him. What love He must have for us.

This new perspective of THE first Christmas has made Annie's first Christmas all the more meaningful. She brought that reality to me this year and it's changed my life. In years to come, I hope I can help her to truly "get" what that first Christmas, and all Christmases, are truly about. Thanks Annie.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Here's another video that helps me truly get Christmas. LOVE this one!